Narcissists Don’t Pick Partners…They Pick Pawns. He Didn’t Choose her. He Used Her.

𝐈 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐝 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐜𝐨𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐥𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐚 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫.

Not because I didn’t want to help women anymore, but because my life was being overturned in ways I never imagined. Between my daughter’s guardianship case and hoping my family would finally support me or give me my inheritance, everything felt overwhelming.

𝐍𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐝, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐢𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 𝐢𝐬 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐧𝐨𝐰.

My platform has always been about calling out narcissism, family scapegoating, dysfunction, and empowering women through healing.

One of the hardest and most defining stories of this past year involves something I’ve never fully talked about. The betrayal between my ex-husband, and my former best friend, became a major factor in me losing custody of my daughter.

When my former best friend and I were still close, I was renting a room in home from her.

It was the same home that was destroyed by Hurricane Beryl this past summer.

The mold in that house damaged my lungs, and I’ve spent the last year trying to heal and rehab them while also trying to get my physical strength back so I can eventually start racing again.

𝐋𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐞, 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐲 𝐰𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐠.

One night, my son Michael had an emergency and had to be taken to the ER. I was still driving home from my other son, Nicholas’s band awards ceremony. When I arrived, my former best friend told me she had already spoken with my ex-husband. Which meant…she already had his phone number. 𝐒𝐡𝐞 contacted him before I even had a chance to reach him.

When I asked her how she even had his number, she tried to give an explanation that made no sense. When I asked again, confused, she snapped at me and yelled, “Why does it matter?”

It mattered because there was no reason for her to have that kind of access unless they had already been talking behind my back.

I had to let the moment go because Michael needed help, but my intuition never let it go.

Not long after, I pulled a tarot reading. The cards came out in a way that pointed directly to secrecy and betrayal. I showed the cards to her casually, the way I always did. She had a strong and emotional reaction that made no sense for someone not involved. Her reaction made perfect sense only if she was emotionally connected to the situation.

Then came Hurricane Beryl, the mold, the house repairs, and finally the time for me to move back in.

My former best friend suddenly began speaking to me in phrases and arguments that were not hers.

She was repeating my ex-husband’s words. Word for word. Even some of my stepfather’s words. She never talked like that before. She had never been able to handle paperwork without help, yet suddenly she was sending long explanations about legalities and leases.

It was obvious she had been having deep conversations with my ex-husband.

The next morning, she told me she would not be renewing my lease.
There was never even a real lease in place. I had only signed backdated documents to help her get her insurance claim approved. None of the insurance money that was supposed to help tenants helped me at all.

I handled everything myself and moved to Dallas alone.

When I pointed this out, she responded like a legal expert overnight. She started sending text messages filled with legal terminology and explanations she would never have written on her own. The only explanation was that she had access to someone who had something to gain from pushing me out of the home.

Because if I had moved back into that home in Fort Bend County, it would have helped me in my daughter’s guardianship case. My ex-husband knew that. Her decision to remove me from the home directly helped him and directly harmed me.

In the end, my ex-husband won guardianship of our daughter.

𝐍𝐨𝐭 because of who I am as a mother.
𝐍𝐨𝐭 because I didn’t fight.
𝐁𝐮𝐭 because I did not have stable housing in the county.

𝐀 𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐩𝐞𝐝 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞.

I now see my daughter only once a month and must give fourteen days notice.

𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐈 𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐝𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐞𝐫.

Not because of anything lacking in me, but because of betrayal, alignment, manipulation, and the influence of people who should never have had that kind of access to my life.

And that is also why I stopped posting. While healing my lungs, healing my heart, rebuilding my life, and fighting a system that was stacked against me, I had to stay silent.

𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐈 𝐚𝐦 𝐝𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐰.


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